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The DRAMA! Fired State Department Employees Receive Tearful Funeral Procession From Colleagues

    Break out your tiny violins, Twitchy readers. Some useless bureaucrats at the State Department have been fired. 

    If you need a few moments to process your grief at this news, please, by all means. We know we’ve already been through an entire box of Kleenex. 





    Or, you know, not. 

    On Friday, about 1,300 employees serving under Marco Rubio started receiving their memos to clear out their desks. Across much of America, where we know the federal government is more bloated than a beached whale carcass, this news was greeted as a step in the right direction. 

    In the DC swamp, however, you would think that Uber Eats has stopped delivering avocado toast, such was the wailing and gnashing of teeth. 

    Watch below as the fired employees were actually given a tearful funeral procession as they exited the building. 

    The theater production inside the State Department headquarters was so elaborate, we even got to witness the Sacred Ritual of Personal Belongings. 

    What, they couldn’t get someone to dress up as Simon of Cyrene to carry their boxes for them? 

    If you think that we’re being a little heartless towards these pink-slipped bureaucrats, take a look at the loving, patriotic memo that one of them allegedly left behind in one of the bathrooms before being shown the door. 

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    Still feel sorry for them? We don’t. 

    They never should have been in government service to begin with. The note is proof of that. 

    How EVER will the State Department function without these employees (most of whom were civil servants and not actual foreign service officers)? 

    Why, with their loss, there are only … 79,000 employees remaining at State. 

    They are in for a RUDE awakening should any of them be qualified enough to get a job in the private sector. 

    It’s like they live on a different planet. Planet Entitlement. 





    HA! (We love Nick.)

    Funny, we don’t recall all of these tearful farewells for federal employees who were fired by Joe Biden for refusing to take an experimental ‘vaccine.’

    As we noted above, 1,300 is a good start. But those are rookie numbers. Rubio’s gotta get those numbers up. 

    We kind of like the idea of having a funeral for them. But our procession would probably look a little more like this: 

    Now, we’re talkin’.





    The theater kids are getting what’s been coming for them for a long time. It’s no wonder they needed to put on a play to weep about it. 

    Say, now there’s a good idea. Everyone clapping and crying might want to start updating their resumes, too. 

    Maybe they should have cried less back when DOGE asked them to send in a regular report about what they did that week. 

    They had a chance to justify their employment. They refused. 

    Welcome to consequences. 

    Even better. Virginia would be a solid red state without the swamp that has infested the counties in Northern Virginia. 





    (Ask this writer how he knows.)

    It is a massive problem. 

    But it is a problem we’re fixing. 

    One theater kid — or 1,300 — at a time. 


    Editor’s Note: President Trump is leading America into the “Golden Age” as Democrats try desperately to stop it.  

    Help us continue to report on President Trump’s successes. Join Twitchy VIP and use promo code FIGHT to get 60% off your membership.





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