Senator Rick Scott (R-Medicare Fraud) had a big day in the Senate yesterday, and we don’t mean like it was Take Your Batboy To Congress Day and Scott had to give a tour and bounce his baby Batboy on his knee or nothin’.
No, it was a big day for standing up for what you believe in, and Scott really put his neck out there, all 185 feet of it.
And what does Rick Scott believe in? Why, just the rights of all billionaires to have life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, free from discrimination by anybody who would want to hurt them or make them feel sad just because of the way God made them, as billionaires.
This pitted him against one of his own, Missouri GOP Senator Josh Hawley, which made it funny.
As CBS News explains, the Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee was debating a measure to ban members of Congress from trading individual stocks. Josh Hawley and the Democrats support this — Hawley is the sponsor, and would go on to vote with Democrats to vote the measure out of committee. But not before this very tense exchange with Scott:
“I practice what I preach,” Hawley said in an awkward exchange with fellow Republicans on the panel. “I don’t have individual stocks, I don’t trade in stocks. I’m not a billionaire, unlike others on this committee. And what I think is, the American people are sending us a clear message.”
“I’m not a billionaire,” THEM’S FIGHTIN’ WORDS at Republican tables! Fight for your honor, Rick Scott! You tell ‘em your pronouns are “ka” and “ching”!
So Scott responded:
Republican Sen. Rick Scott, who was not born wealthy but is now worth hundreds of millions of dollars, according to his public filings, said he agrees lawmakers shouldn’t be trading stocks. But he defended the ability for members of Congress to be rich, and called attacks on the wealthy “disgusting.”
“He made a reference to billionaires, okay?” Scott said of Hawley. “I don’t know when in this country it became a negative to make money. But somehow, if you’ve made money, you’re supposedly — I think Senator Hawley suggests — you shouldn’t be serving, because you might trade stocks.”
“Anybody want to be poor? I don’t.” Scott continued. “Right? So this idea that we’re going to attack people because they make money is wrong. Is absolutely wrong. We should cherish all of our different backgrounds. … So, I think it’s disgusting what is going on here.”
Oh, so now it’s a sin to possess money! Rick Scott was raging. Does Josh Hawley know Jesus paid for his sins on the cross with good old American cash? Does Josh Hawley think crosses grow on trees? We’re gonna attack people just for making money from the crosses they sell? Juuuuuuust great!
We should cherish each billionaire, whether they are a one-billionaire or a hundred-billionaire! All billionaires matter! Rick Scott believes in Diversity, Equity and Inclusion of all billionaires to make sure they all get a seat at the decision-making table of America, for the first time ever! He’s not gonna sit in the back of your bus, Josh Hawley!
So, um, yes. You may watch Scott’s impassioned plea here:
“This idea that we’re gonna attack people because they make money is wrong!” said Scott, with his heart on his sleeve. “It’s absolutely wrong,” he said, like he was opposing something on the moral level of Donald Trump’s Gestapo kidnapping innocent people without due process and human trafficking them to get raped in foreign prisons.
“I think it is DISGUSTING what is going on here!” said Rick Scott, about Josh Hawley’s mean bill.
So basically, this bill says members of Congress and their spouses can’t trade individual stocks, and if they own them, they have to sell them 180 days from enactment of such law. It doesn’t ban ETFs or anything. It’s not insane, and that’s clearly what Hawley was alluding to when he said he doesn’t own individual stocks. He’s not sitting here saying he and his foul fascist lawyer wife Erin don’t have retirement savings or something. The bill just says that if you are serving The People in Congress (hahahaha, that wasn’t a joke, stop laughing) that you should not be able to trade individual stocks, AKA get rich off of buying/selling stocks related to legislation and maneuvers you know are happening before We The People know about it.
You know, insider trading, in essence, and also just the literal definition of the crime.
Rick Scott is mad that his own colleague Josh Hawley is trying to stop him, the guy who committed Medicare fraud, from committing insider trading. That’s what those histrionics up there are about.
Preach, honey, preach!
As we said, this is Hawley’s bill, yay, everybody praise Josh Hawley for believing in One Good Thing, since all his other beliefs are Nazi Nazi fuuuuuuuuuckin’ Nazi. You can tell it’s his bill because like the little rat-faced sack of pus he is, he called it the Preventing Elected Leaders from Owning Securities and Investments (PELOSI) Act, har har har, we get it, Nancy Pelosi is the richest lady who ever lived, did you hear about her ice cream collection she keeps in her gold-plated refrigerator/freezer combinations?
Perhaps he should come up with an anagram that spells out Rick Scott Is A Little Bitch Act instead. Or something that more accurately reflects that it was him and the Democrats voting for this, even though he Josh Hawley himself is a little bitch who names bills after Nancy Pelosi. Oh wait, he did! He actually will now call it the “Honest Act,” since it’s only Democrats voting with him and to not agree with their demand that he change the name would make him look like a real piece of shit.
Know who else supports this bill?
“While I appreciate the creativity of my Republican colleagues in drafting legislative acronyms, I welcome any serious effort to raise ethical standards in public service,” Pelosi said.
Uh huh, yep.
CBS News notes that this bill would even ban presidents and vice presidents from trading individual stocks, but not the current president or vice president, because we guess Josh Hawley’s little rat nuts obviously aren’t big enough to pull off something like that. Indeed, Hawley changed the bill to make sure it wouldn’t affect poor President Fuck Me With All Your Bribes. (It’s funny, because Rand Paul’s stated excuse for opposing the bill is that it should either apply to everybody or nobody, so if Trump gets a carve-out, he’s out.)
Trump still hates it, and also clearly has not read it and does not understand it, as he explained on Truth Social yesterday:
“The Democrats, because of our tremendous ACHIEVEMENTS and SUCCESS, have been trying to ‘Target’ me for a long period of time, and they’re using Josh Hawley, who I got elected TWICE, as a pawn to help them,” the president wrote. “I wonder why Hawley would pass a Bill that Nancy Pelosi is in absolute love with — He is playing right into the dirty hands of the Democrats. It’s a great Bill for her, and her ‘husband,’ but so bad for our Country!”
Oh that’s great, we’re still doing #jokes on the time Nancy Pelosi’s octogenarian husband got almost murdered by a lunatic Trump follower who beat him in the head with a hammer, and Republicans and Trumps pretended to believe it was a lover’s spat even though that guy’s in prison now and fully explained how he was doing it for Trump. That’s real neat!
While we’re remembering things, Trump, why don’t you go suck on the ghost of your best pedophile friend Jeffrey Epstein while you listen to “Memory” from CATS and jack off to your memories of Jeffrey Epstein, you fucking pervert, Epstein Epstein Epstein, and in summary and in conclusion, Epstein?
We are just suggesting.
This was a blog post about Rick Scott and Josh Hawley and banning members of Congress from trading individual stocks, but we ended it with EPSTEIN, because we are professionals.
[CBS News]
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