From Chaos to Calm: What to Do When Life Feels Like Too Much

Everyone’s version of “spiraling” looks different. Mine typically unravels in one of two ways. I’ve either woken up in the middle of the night crafting a mental check-list of everything that could possibly go wrong—or, I’ve taken on too much and the smallest inconvenience sends my calm facade into chaos. Life can be a lot. Whether you’re caring for kids or aging parents (or both), navigating an evolving job market, or simply trying to absorb the latest headlines, there’s no shortage of ways to feel unmoored these days. When everything seems like too much, even remembering to breathe can feel out of reach.

But this is exactly when it matters the most. Becoming a more grounded person doesn’t happen in a cocoon of calm—it happens within the chaos. It happens when we sense a storm swirling, yet know precisely how to anchor even deeper so the mind doesn’t take us for a ride. Not every moment will offer ease, of course, but each one holds a potential for presence that we can choose to mine for gold.

Keep reading for some practices that aren’t about escape, but about return. In as little as five minutes, or even less, we can shift our energy when we’re feeling too much of it. A breath. A pause. A small act of noticing. This is where it begins, where “a lot” transforms into awareness.

Image above by Michelle Nash.

Why Grounding Works (Even in Micro-Doses)

First, what does it mean to ground? It means to come home to where you are: your breath, your body, the solid surface beneath your feet. The present is where your power is, and in a world that’s constantly pulling us away from ourselves—into screens, into tasks, into spiraling what-ifs—grounding quiets the noise. 

Kelli Lane Redfield, a marriage and family trauma therapist based in San Diego, California, dives deeper into the benefit of grounding. “Grounding is an important part of trauma therapy,” she explains, saying that if someone is flooded, dissociated, or anxious, they always start with a few grounding practices first. “Emotional dysregulation can be an issue when dealing with trauma, since the body remembers it. When we discuss grounding and processing emotions, trauma therapists actually help clients ‘locate’ where the feeling is showing up in the body.”

With her clients, Redfield will often direct them to send breath to the body part that’s feeling reactive, sit with it, then ask, “What is your body needing you to know today?” 

Grounding makes perspective possible, and it’s easier than we think it is. Research shows that even just a few minutes of short mindfulness practices can reduce stress and increase focus. A few deep, conscious breaths can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, shifting us out of fight-or-flight and into a calmer, more regulated state. If you’re feeling scattered, restless, or anxious, it’s not a sign you need to push harder. It may be your nervous system quietly asking for a pause. Grounding can help restore balance when besieged by chronic stress. 

5-Minute Grounding Resets That Actually Work

Whatever the mind spiral may look like, release the myth that there’s something wrong with you for having it. To worry is human, but catching yourself in the swirl—that single moment of awareness—is the opening where the light gets in. That’s where presence begins, wherever you choose to pause. 

Redfield recommends the below practices for anyone looking to shift their energy. These aren’t about doing more. They’re about noticing what’s true, reconnecting with your body, and remembering you’re not alone even when you feel incapable. You’re here and you’re OK.

4-7-8 Breathing

Breath in for 4 counts. Hold for 7 counts. Exhale for 8 counts.

Find a comfortable position, either sitting upright or lying down. Allow the shoulders to soften and the jaw to relax. Eyes can close or stay gently open with a soft gaze. Begin by exhaling completely through the mouth, making a gentle whooshing sound. Breath in for 4 counts, hold for 7 counts, exhale for 8 counts. The exhale must be longer to engage the parasympathetic nervous system reset.

When feeling anxious, breathing often becomes rapid and shallow. Slowing the breath and extending the exhale can help lower heart rate and bring a sense of steadiness and calm. 4-7-8 breathing can be used before sleep, after stressful moments, or anytime there’s a need to reset and feel more grounded.

Great for: shifting from stress to stillness in under two minutes.

Listen to Binaural Beats

Designed to regulate and calm.

Researchers from Kings College studied the most relaxing songs to lower anxiety. Then, after identifying the songs, they created one song that if listened to in the car or on headphones would help lower overall anxiety by 65%.

Weightless is an ambient music piece created by the British group Marconi Union in collaboration with sound therapists. Its combination of rhythms, harmonies, and bass frequencies help slow heart rate, lower blood pressure, and decrease levels of stress hormones, like cortisol. Elements of the song, like its continuous, soothing rhythm and lack of a predictable melody, also help the brain let go of anticipation and sink into a calmer state. The tempo gradually slows to around 50-60 beats per minute, encouraging the listener’s heart rate to follow.

Great for: full body regulation or listening to while on the go.

5-4-3-2-1 Sensory Scan

Name 5 things you see, 4 you can touch, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, 1 you taste.

This psychosomatic (body-based) practice uses the senses to disrupt racing thoughts and anchor you in the present moment. Examples could be: tasting one sour candy, smelling two essential oils, hearing three sounds, like a clicking pen, the AC, a fan; feeling four touch-based sensations, like slime or squishy fidgets, and naming five objects you see. All of your senses can help guide you away from your thoughts and come back into your body.

Great for: interrupting spirals and bringing you back into the now.

Hand on Heart, Eyes Closed

Say to yourself: “I’m safe. I’m here. I don’t need to solve it all right now.”

This small act of self-soothing sends powerful signals to the brain that you’re not in immediate danger. By placing your hand on your heart, you’re stimulating the vagus nerve and helping ease your body back to calm. Physical touch coupled with affirmations can also activate oxytocin and reduce the release of stress hormones.

Great for: softening anxiety with presence and self-compassion.

Cold Water Reset

Splash your face or run your hands under cold water. For 30 seconds.

When cold water touches your face—especially under the eyes and around the nostrils—it stimulates the trigeminal nerve, which helps trigger the dive reflex. This reflex activates the parasympathetic nervous system via the vagus nerve, slowing your heart rate and calming the body. It’s a surprisingly effective way to jolt out of panic or mental fog.

Note: People with certain health conditions (IE: heart problems) should check with a medical professional before using cold water immersion.

Great for: stopping panic in its tracks and clearing mental clutter.

Short Bursts of Exercise

Jumping jacks. Running in place. Dancing.  

When your body is holding onto too much—tension, anxiety, adrenaline—movement can offer an immediate outlet. Short bursts of physical activity help metabolize the excess energy that builds up during a stress response, especially when you’re stuck in fight-or-flight. Even just 30 seconds of jumping jacks or dancing to your favorite song can shift your state, both mentally and physically.

Great for: lowering adrenaline levels and creating a sense of grounding.

Step Outside Barefoot

Feel the ground beneath you. Breathe. Let the sun or breeze touch your skin.

Connecting directly with the earth—also called “earthing”—has both practical and symbolic benefits. When your bare feet touch soil, grass, or sand, you’re engaging in a subtle but powerful physiological exchange that can support mood, improve sleep and cortisol regulation, and restore balance. Feeling something firm beneath your feet can also serve as an important reminder: Stability exists. You’re supported even in those moments when it feels like you’re holding too much.

Great for: reconnecting with your body and the natural world.

Making Presence a Practice (Even When Life Feels Full)

While these actions may feel small, over time they do something important: They develop your ability to not get lost in your mind. You’ll begin to notice the pause before the panic. The inhale before the response. You’ll catch yourself mid-scroll, mid-spiral, mid-overwhelm—and realize you can choose a different path.

This is what it means to make presence a practice. It’s not reserved for hour-long meditations or silent retreats, but exists in the everyday choices woven into the hum of real life. Use these as a starting point, and know that if these tools feel like they’re only scratching the surface, then it might be time to reach out to a mental health professional for deeper, more personalized support.

Remember that presence isn’t about perfection. It’s about your willingness to return, again and again, to the wholeness that’s always been within you. Reclaim it one breath at a time.